killclaudio: (Default)
[personal profile] killclaudio
For this week's [livejournal.com profile] ds_snippets challenge, the mods were kind enough to let me write haiku. It's years since I've actually written haiku, so it was nice to have an excuse again.

Title: Shattered Light
Fandom: Due South
Rating: G
Length: words
Prompt: home

January was
A rush of snow, light, fur and
Exhilaration.

By February
You had slowed to a full stop.
He chose the city.

In March you tracked him
Across dark skies and streets. Clipped
Your wings at his side.

Spring in Chicago
Is invisible; soundless
As an unused sled.

Only his hands are
Cold and crisp against your cheeks,
Even in summer.

July. Light shatters
Across polished floors. You still
Swear you are happy.

(no subject)

Date: 2007-07-13 06:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] viciouscats.livejournal.com
This is lovely! Post-CotW Fraser in Chicago never fails to make me a little bit sad.

(no subject)

Date: 2007-07-13 08:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greenonme.livejournal.com
oh darling. I don't want to cry, but you're making me come very close here.

(no subject)

Date: 2007-07-14 05:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nos4a2no9.livejournal.com
I...wow. I usually avoid poetry, but you've never steered me wrong and this was absolutely gorgeous. That last stanza knocked me flat: I've been thinking about those last lines all night, and I still can't quite get over how hauntingly beautiful they are, how sad and sweet and ominous they seem. And poor Fraser: his heartbreak over Ray's decision comes across so clearly here, and the ways in which the city is slowly killing him with its light and heat and noise. This is a whole story expressed in five-seven-five beats, and I really envy your ability to express so much in so few lines. I've printed the poem out and tacked it to my bulletin board, and I keep re-reading it. Thanks for posting this!

(no subject)

Date: 2007-07-16 02:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slidellra.livejournal.com
Good lord, that's wonderful. Gorgeous language and an elegantly conveyed story with a hell of an emotional punch. You rock.

(no subject)

Date: 2007-08-13 10:37 am (UTC)
luzula: a Luzula pilosa, or hairy wood-rush (Default)
From: [personal profile] luzula
Oh. Ow. This is painful (Fraser with clipped wings!), but very beautiful. Each word is just right.

(no subject)

Date: 2007-12-17 09:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] militantstemmed.livejournal.com
lovely. i love haiku! i especially like the image of the unused sled. thanks.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-02-16 02:44 am (UTC)
ext_3554: dream wolf (Default)
From: [identity profile] keerawa.livejournal.com
I somehow missed this first time around. Damn, you are GOOD. The images in this are so sparse, but they make me ache for Fraser.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-02-18 07:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spuffyduds.livejournal.com
GOD. I somehow missed this, first time around. This is gorgeous and heartbreaking.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-08-25 10:00 pm (UTC)
jesse_the_k: Macro photo of left eye of my mostly black border collie mutt (Default)
From: [personal profile] jesse_the_k
As [livejournal.com profile] luzula sang

your seven searing triplets,

tears overflowed.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-08-31 07:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] malnpudl.livejournal.com
I followed a link here from Aka's snippets rec post and I'm so very glad I did.

Wow. This is amazing. Stunning.

You broke me so pretty.

So very much love.